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Contact

No, this blog post (shockingly) is not a book by Carl Sagan.  Sorry?

Many things about contact lenses baffle me, not least why they get so friggin’ dry all the time.  Like, why does “easy rub” contact solution still exist when we now have the technology for no-rub formulas?  That’s like choosing to wash your dishes by hand if dishwashers existed and cost the exact same amount as not having a dishwasher.  Just, why?

Most recently, I’m scratching my head over a commercial for these continuous-wear lenses.  Conventional wisdom says that if you sleep in your contacts, you will wake up feeling like someone saran-wrapped your eyes.  Yet somebody had the idea to make a pair that you can “comfortably” wear for up to 30 days and nights, especially for “people who sleep in their lenses.”

The commercial narrator’s voice keeps an even tone as he says this, but I hear his judgment.  Any contact-wearer knows that sleeping in your lenses is most often done by blacked-out drunks, people engaging in one-night-stands, narcoleptics, and idiots.  What are you trying to say, Air Optix?

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